Embracing Random Acts of Kindness
Last June, my friend and I found ourselves at a bus stop in the quaint town of Knighton, located on the picturesque Welsh border. After five days of traversing the Offa’s Dyke long-distance hiking trail, we were exhausted. Our feet ached, and we felt a twinge of anxiety about making it back to our car in Hay-on-Wye. This required us to catch two rural buses and a train, all of which were infrequent. Accompanied by a well-behaved miniature schnauzer and two large suitcases that seemed out of place among our hiking gear (having used a luggage service for our bags), we arrived at the bus stop a full 15 minutes before the scheduled departure time.
As the scheduled time passed, our worry escalated. Another bus arrived, but it wasn’t ours. Panic began to set in, given our limited window to get back to the car before the long drive of nearly 100 miles to our final destination. Seeking reassurance, I approached a nearby market trader to inquire about the reliability of local buses. Just as we were weighing alternative plans, a kind shopper overheard our predicament. “I can give you a ride to the railway station,” she offered. Although we hesitated, she insisted with a warm smile. Overjoyed, we squeezed our luggage and the dog into her car, and she whisked us away, ensuring we caught our train connections. We offered her money for her kindness, but she graciously declined, accepting instead a bottle of local wine we had purchased as a souvenir.
This spontaneous act of kindness highlighted the profound impact such gestures can have, both on individuals and society at large. Research indicates that engaging in acts of kindness significantly enhances a person’s wellbeing, triggering the release of “feel-good” hormones like oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin. Remarkably, both the giver and the recipient experience benefits. A study from Harvard University revealed that simply witnessing an act of kindness increases salivary immunoglobulin A, a crucial component of the immune system.
“Random acts of kindness uplift both the giver and the receiver,” explains Claudia Hammond, an award-winning broadcaster, psychology lecturer, and author of The Keys of Kindness. However, she notes that fear of judgment often inhibits us from expressing our kindness. “I participated in The Kindness Test, a large study by researchers at the University of Sussex in collaboration with the BBC, where 60,000 individuals took part. We discovered that the primary reason people refrain from being kind to strangers is the fear of being misinterpreted, worrying they might feel embarrassed if their intentions were misunderstood. Yet, when we asked individuals about their experiences receiving kindness, embarrassment hardly ever came up. People genuinely appreciate acts of kindness.”
Understanding the Ripple Effect
“Our study showed that those who perform and receive kindness, as well as those who simply observe it, report higher levels of wellbeing,” Hammond adds. “In a world that can often feel gloomy, actively seeking out acts of kindness — like a kindness ‘twitcher’ — can significantly improve our mood.” She emphasizes that acts of kindness are inherently genuine, and there’s no singular “right” way to offer them. “Some believe that if performing a kind act benefits you as well, it isn’t true altruism. I disagree. Our evolutionary history suggests that cooperation is vital for survival, and our brains reward us for being kind to foster this cooperation. As long as the intention is to benefit someone else, it’s perfectly fine if you feel good about it too.”
We spoke to six individuals who shared their heartfelt experiences of receiving unexpected acts of kindness:
Lou Platt, 45, West Midlands
“I’m a drama therapist, and I used to carry a unique collection of over 100 finger puppets in a fancy cloth bag, originally intended for boots — a brand I don’t even own. One day, I returned to my car to find it had been rummaged through, and my beloved puppets were gone. I was devastated. Posting about my loss on Facebook led to a delightful surprise: friends and even acquaintances began sending me finger puppets! I documented their arrival, and soon I had over 120 puppets from all around the world, including handmade gifts from the U.S. It was such a heartwarming display of creative generosity, and I still cherish the thought that my original puppets might be loved by someone else, wherever they are now.”
Emily Cope, 33, London
“In early 2023, with my daughter Daisy just weeks old, I dashed to the store for bread while carrying her in a baby carrier. As I finished shopping, a downpour began, and I realized I had forgotten to buy an umbrella. I was overwhelmed and stressed when a kind man approached and asked if I was okay. He then disappeared into the shop and returned with a large umbrella, handing it to me before continuing on his way to work. I still have that umbrella, and it serves as a joyful reminder of his thoughtful gesture.”
Danielle de Wolfe, 33, London
“At 21, I accidentally left my handbag on the train, which contained everything important to me — house keys, wallet, headphones, makeup, and an umbrella. In a panic, I rushed to a station worker at Wimbledon station, who promptly contacted the train driver. To my surprise, the driver, who could have easily handed my bag in to lost property, emerged from the train with my handbag and a cheerful smile. His small act of kindness meant the world to me, saving me from weeks of hassle trying to recover my belongings.”
Clare Jones, 35, London
“After being mugged outside my apartment in London, I was in tears and utterly shaken. A neighbor I’d never met before rushed down in her pajamas to comfort me. She invited me inside, lent me her laptop to cancel my cards, and offered her support during a very distressing time. This kind stranger became one of my closest friends, and I often reflect on how this unfortunate event led to such a wonderful connection. It reaffirmed my belief that people are inherently good and willing to help one another, even in a bustling city like London.”
Iram Ghafoor, 30, Pakistan
“As a new driver, I often find parking challenging. Recently, while attempting to park in a congested area, I struggled and ended up blocking traffic. A nearby cab driver, noticing my predicament, kindly offered his assistance. He took my car keys and expertly parked my car for me. I was grateful for his patience and kindness. Later that day, I encountered a rude person while parking in another area, which made me appreciate the cab driver’s generosity even more. His calm demeanor transformed a stressful moment into a positive experience.”
Helen Dainty, 45, from the West Midlands, is currently cycling around the world
“During my travels through Saudi Arabia, I encountered some of the most generous people. On one occasion, I met Taghreed in a coffee shop in Tabuk. She took Saudi hospitality to a whole new level by inviting me to a neighboring restaurant for lunch, where she ordered an extravagant feast that was far too much for just the two of us. She then invited me to stay with her family, showing me around the area and introducing me to the vibrant nightlife. Her kindness provided me with an invaluable insight into the life of a modern Saudi woman. Ultimately, I had to fabricate a small excuse about my visa running out just to leave her warm hospitality!”
